Can Leadership Ever Truly Log Off?

Balancing Work Responsibilities with the Need for True Time Off

Last week was a tough one. In the early hours of Monday morning, my daughter woke up with a 103-degree fever, and I knew the flu had finally hit our household. Six hours later, I started feeling off myself, and thus began a week of so-called “rest” and recovery.

I officially took Monday and Tuesday off to care for my daughter and attempt to recover. I’m incredibly fortunate that my husband’s job is flexible—he was able to be home for support. Later in the week, when we felt less contagious, my mom even came up to help. Despite all that support, I probably could have used the full five days to rest. But work had other plans.

The Reality of Leadership: Work Never Pauses

Even though I was out sick, pressing issues kept piling up:

The site was experiencing issues.
My Principal Engineer was also out sick all week.
Unexpected compensation and promotion discussions were happening at the manager level.
I needed to meet with HR to plan a hiring strategy for a new team.
Annual reviews were due.
The usual weekly administrative to-dos still needed to be completed.

Had this been planned PTO, I would have worked ahead to finish tasks, delegated responsibilities, and set expectations for my time away. But when unexpected time off happens, there’s no time to prepare—you just do your best.

The Frustration of Being Pulled Back In

I found myself feeling frustrated. I needed to step away and completely log off to care for my daughter and recover, but I didn’t feel like I truly could. There was too much happening, too many unknowns, and I felt a responsibility to show up for my team—especially in the compensation and promotion discussions.

(That said, my peer in my department had my back in my absence—thank you so much!)

But it made me question:

How can I expect my team to feel confident that they can fully log off when I don’t set the same example?
Is it even possible for leadership to fully step away?

If Leaders Can’t Log Off, Can Anyone?

My boss, an SVP, has been on extended PTO. Before he left, I promised him I wouldn’t bother him while he was away visiting family.

And yet… I reached out at least five times (probably more). Sometimes I messaged him directly. Other times, I tagged him in notes or documents.

Sorry, Boss.

No Easy Answers—Just Questions

I don’t have a perfect solution here. I’m simply asking the question and wondering what others experience or expect.

As leaders, can we ever truly go offline?
While planning ahead helps, what about unexpected time away?
How do we ensure our teams know that they can and should fully disengage during PTO—if we don’t set that example ourselves?

I’d love to hear from others: Have you successfully “fully logged off” as a leader? If so, how?